I, Claudia, received the following e-mail from a person I had no reason to believe existed. No wonder Courtny Li has been attempting to deflect me to her widowed and thus UNmarried father. Ohmigawd!
Dear goddess or whoever you're and where you're,
Now I finally understand why my fu-king sits in front of our daughter's computer early in the morning and late in the night typing away, claiming he's monitoring the performance of his stock and commodity.
Buuullshit. Let me tell you, his stock performs badly, and he performs even worse in bed. Trust me, I've experienced this for nearly a quarter of a century. However, please do not let my note discourage you from writing him, for the only time of the day when he feels alive is when he's sitting in front of computer. A little bit of secret grin is often revealed that is combined with an unfamiliar satisfaction and yearning. I know this man needs help. Next year for our Chinese people is the Year of Dog. I think it's more suitable to be the Year of Shrink, one for my husband, one for me. Do you think you may need one as well? Perhaps we can all go to the same shrink and ask for discount.
Yours, Mrs. Li
fair warning: on block island or manhattan or in missouri, we can be a little salty
2 comments:
1922, 1934, 1946, 1958, 1970, 1982, 1994, 2006
People born in the Year of the Dog possess the best traits of human nature. They have a deep sense of loyalty, are honest, and inspire other people's confidence because they know how to keep secrets. But Dog People are somewhat selfish, terribly stubborn, and eccentric. They care little for wealth, yet somehow always seem to have money. They can be cold emotionally and sometimes distant at parties. They can find fault with many things and are noted for their sharp tongues. Dog people make good leaders. They are compatible with those born in the Years of the Horse, Tiger, and Rabbit.
We're aware, are we not, that this doggie company includes: Moi, "A", and "Milena Said." Must be what Moxie sees in me.
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