bad electronic karma

I hope that Mercury or Mars or whatever is finally out of retrograde, because I have had it with my wireless electronics that all have to be plugged in to both an electrical socket and a phone line.
It started when I removed the cable for the cable TV. Perhaps the coaxial gods were angry? I have two remaining functional phone jacks after tripping over the one in my bedroom. The cable seems to have shared space with one of the other phone lines, the one in your bedroom, my friends.
So that's where I had the master wireless phone, wireless DSL router and yes, the wireless printer (And supposed fax machine that I have to return by tomorrow to get my money back since it doesn't feed the paper. Also the cable box has to be returned by tomorrow).
Well, with all systems down, I tried to trace the phone line in and out of walls to see where it might have been disturbed. However, it's one of those really old twisted ones that was likely installed before my birth and certainly before I moved into this apartment 30-some-odd years ago, so it's been painted over and is impossible to follow on its absolutely nonsensical rounds. Plus, I was afraid to mess with it much lest the last remaining phone jack go on the fritz.
Naturally, the last remaining phone jack is in the middle of the kitchen wall nowhere near an electrical outlet. Just shoot me.
So now there are are phone wires and extension cords garlanded all around the kitchen with no place to set up the "wireless" printer/fax, which is okay because I have to return it anyway.
I know, I know. More than you needed to know.