still serving beer

The West Plains Daily Quill, my favorite small newspaper in the world, put the 200th anniversary of Thomasville, Mo., on the front page yesterday. Yes, it's the New Goose, turquoise eyeliner and glass blocks and all, but is there any reference to the fact that Old Carl is no longer the owner? Any mention of the newest taxpayer in this mouldering town? Any mention in the lineup of Famous People of T'ville that a world renowned journalist who has climbed Mt. Everest and canoed the Amazon, interviewed two Presidents Bush and countless movie stars now calls the Goose home?
This is the peril of talking to only one source for a story, oh Quill reporter whose boss I am likethis with.
And this diss, despite the fact that I know Frank Martin!

home sweet home

And don't say anything if you can't say something nice.

the only redneck in new york

While most people are counting sheep, I am thinking about septic tanks. More specifically, the nonfunctional one at the Goose, which I am scheduled to take ownership of on March 13. At 11:00 ayem. So I called the guy who used to own the Goose who thinks maybe there are a couple septic tanks on the property, though he doesn't really know where they are.
"Anyway, there's a guy who put mine in for me for about a thousand dollars," he said.
"How long did it take you to get the permits?" I asked.
"Permits?" he asked incredulously. "You really don't understand us hillbillies, do you?"