3.08.2016

bad cats

Agent Diabolique, with a piece of my hide in his mouth.Was this a "righteous bite?"

Some of you may remember the devil cat who tore into me and ripped off my skin (see above) in Otra Rubia's aerie. As always when I have to do with cats (or really, most animals), I am being, ahem, hounded by Attourney Nose Bite Kitty (or, as he styles himself, being French, Nez Bite Kitty, Esq.) Following is his latest missive in translation:
Dear Madame: It is I again, Nose Bite Kitty Esq.:  Regarding your post of Feb.1: By inciting our agent Le Diabolique to bite you, you have inadvertently as they say in your country, "blown his cover." Agent Diabolique, a member of our agency,  has been working in combination with the French police and your FBI.  Posing as a house pet, he is part of a large sting operation attempting to infiltrate and expose the illegal importation of big cats into the United States. These "fat cat" Americans seem all too fond of big cats themselves, and more than one has been arrested so far. Luckily for you, your friend Otra Rubia has been cleared of any involvement. We would like to inform you that both the French police and the FBI consider the injury you experienced to be a  righteous bite," much like a "righteous shoot." If you are contemplating assault charges, we advise you to lick your wounds and remain quiet.*

*For the original French—"Chère Madame, Il est je encore, Nez Bite Kitty Esq .: En ce qui concerne votre poste de 1 er février: En incitant notre agent Le Diabolique à vous mordre". . . etc etc etc—please inquire in the comments section.
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9 comments:

  1. Nose Bite Kitty, Esq.March 08, 2016 3:41 PM

    Cher Madame: Il faut que vous écrivez "You Fat Cat Americans." Un peu de précision, s'il vous plait! NBK, Esq.

    ReplyDelete
  2. CBAMarch 08, 2016 9:06 PM

    WHY ISN'T ANYONE COMMENTING ON ANY OF THESE POSTS!!

    We all used to.

    Claudia will lose heart!!

    Say something everyone, even if it's meaningless.

    ReplyDelete
  3. AnonymousMarch 08, 2016 9:35 PM

    I will say sumpin!

    That Devil Kat is my BABY! (well... my nephew).

    He is too much bad and funny and biting on Claudie makes sense bc she is also too much bad and funny and nice and pretty!

    Kay

    ReplyDelete
  4. otra rubiaMarch 08, 2016 10:03 PM

    I am formulating my response. But first, I must consult my counsel, the eminent Nose Bite Kitty, Esq.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Kate Knapp Artist BlogMarch 08, 2016 10:05 PM

    Just for the record my wonderful good cat FeeFee (black AND white) died last week after 20 years of no biting and much loving service to our family...she was buried in the garden by the roses( thank God the ground was not frozen)

    ReplyDelete
  6. cbaMarch 09, 2016 1:15 AM

    Dear Sweet FeeFee. She was the very best Kitty. xxxooo

    ReplyDelete
  7. Nose Bite Kitty Esq.March 09, 2016 1:30 AM

    Chère Mademoiselle Rubia: Je serai honoré et heureux d'agir comme votre avoCat. S'il vous plaît être conscient que nous sommes e-attribuons votre "animal de compagnie" à la région de Washington DC, car il y a beaucoup de gens là-bas richement mérité d'être piqué.
    Dès que notre société se termine régler la succession de Miss FeeFee, nous prendrons contact avec vous et vous aider.
    Sincerement, Nez Bite Kitty, Esq.

    et ensuite la translation:

    Dear Mademoiselle Rubia: I will be honored and happy to act as your solicitor. Please be aware that we are re-assigning your "pet" to the Washington DC area, since there are many people there richly deserved of being bitten.
    As soon as our firm finishes settling Miss FeeFee's estate, we will contact you and assist you.
    Sincerely, Nose Bite Kitty Esq.

    ReplyDelete
  8. ClaudiaMarch 09, 2016 8:37 AM

    Jack Satan has a ready made home in DC with Auntie Kay. He will probably bite her too.
    Iy was not a righteous bite, by the way. I only wanted to put him in the other room out of the way while the stove was delivered.

    ReplyDelete
  9. DianneMarch 09, 2016 9:17 AM

    Sympathies to poor Kate on the loss of FeeFee...

    ReplyDelete