10.21.2005

so sorry, Mr. Li


Dear Mr. Li,
Your agressive marketing is starting to get on my nerves. Not to mention your spelling and grammer.
As you see, I have found a spot for the last item you sent me.
Please make sure this IS the last item. I do not wish to buy any more items. I do not want any more items even if they are free. I have enough items, of all kinds. And of this particular item, one is more than enough.
Please do not contact me again with your increasingly desperate self promotions.
I look forward to not hearing from you ever again.
Sincerely,
Owner and Proprietor of Claudia's Surf City

12 comments:

  1. Li feeling so hurt, after such loyality to Lady, may commit seppuku.

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  2. Bad Lady forget Li has shell cruet with small beady eyes for immediete ship.
    Too much coffee time.
    Not should kill Li. Watch out! Wulverines very fierce beings.

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  3. Li glad, even though dagger poised at belly, to see Lady have master feng-shui in love-nest bathroom.

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  4. I think its the all-Asians-are-alike syndrome—another thing that bothers me about Mr. Li. Though I do not want his death on my hands. Heap bad karma! That's Indian—right? All Indians talk alike too.

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  5. Li make one last speak. Li Honorable father-san Chinese. Li honoable mother-san Japaneese. Li double blessed by Buddha. Now Li say "Sayonara, Lady San and Mr. Phil." I go to josh house. Mebbe seppuku, mebbe not. Listen to Puccini first. Decide then.

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  6. Li decide not die. Li no Butterfly. Li listen Bruce Boss, boss say "No one babee, but the brave... were strong enough to save something from what they gave." So Li has save cruet set, modified with small beady eyes. Not sending so easliy to ungrateful wulverine carpenter Lady, prove Li brave man.

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  7. Li have commit grave clerical speeling error. Like Buddah. Li pray to Buddha in the joss house. Pray to Kwan Dai, also, warrior god for braveness to sing Bruce and fight wulverines.

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  8. In spie of rewolve not to speak Wulverine Lady, Li must add: Master Bruce fine mix nations, too. Bruce san Italian-Irish. Brave man, Bruce.

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  9. I heard about this advertising scheme on a another blog, that gives away free Apple ipods. It sounded like a scam, but after I googled it, it was legitmiate. You have to sign up for an offer from one the sponser companies. I did the free credit report one and canceled before the free trial time was up. That was it! I'm hoping to get it in time for my sons B-day.
    http://ipods.freepay.com/?r=16086375

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  10. Hah, another treacherous merchant try steal Lady from Li. Oh! Frgot. Lady not Li customer any much.
    Have new muse Warren, say " saw werewulve walking with Chinee menu in has hand."!!! Ha! Not only Li know about fierce and also dangerous wulverines, sleeping in coffee grounds from Transylvania. Phew! Confuscious say "It's a werewulve eat werewulve world". So especially among merchant of fine merchandise.

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  11. Perhaps Mr Li could deliver
    chinese food to the island.
    Poo Poo platter with flame to heat your hands.

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  12. Li only sell fine dry good items. No food. Werwulf, howver, you may seek as Warren say werwouf was "looking for a place called Lee Ho Fook's". Warren say werwulve going to eat "a big dish of beef chow mein". Maybe ask same. Watch out for wulverines. Are similar to werewulves, but Warren say werewulf allowed dine Trader Vics, and has groomed hair.

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